


Behind the Mask

by MidnightCassiopeia



Series: Mino's Anxiety [4]
Category: Winner (Band)
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Disorder, Comfort, Comfort cuddle, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hugs, Jhonny is a Queen, Mino deserves the world, Panic, Platonic Cuddling, Same with the rest of winner, Static thoughts, i don't make the rules, soft hours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:33:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26435719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidnightCassiopeia/pseuds/MidnightCassiopeia
Summary: The thoughts build and the static gets louder and soon it becomes too much. It's a good thing Mino has a family he can rely on in Winner.
Relationships: Lee Seunghoon/Song Minho | Mino
Series: Mino's Anxiety [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1510616
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	Behind the Mask

It was so easy. Just smile. Laugh. Hide the noise and emotions. Wave, post a picture, draw or paint. Post to insta. Wear the mask. 

Mino held his head and slumped on his bed. It was so loud. Everything was loud. Too many thoughts. Too much going on. Too much. He whipped around and grabbed at his pillow, moving to throw it before thinking better of it and hugging it to his chest, breathing deep and slow, the familiar mask coming back up and slipping into place. He sighed before he sat up, dropped the pillow back onto his bed and stepped out of his bedroom, leaning down to pet Jhonny before slipping his shoes on and heading for the door, plans to paint in his studio again forming in his mind, pushing back some of the constant noise.

He made it to the studio and slipped his jacket off, throwing on his smock and going through the motions to prepare his workspace. And then he stopped. He sat down and looked at the canvas, trying to decide what to paint. He stared at the canvas, and stared. The white expanse taking up his vision. Suddenly his phone rang, he jolted, woken from what felt like a deep sleep, passing his hand over his eyes before looking at the screen. 

"Mino! The Hyungs are home! Where are you?"

"I--" his voice was rough, cracked from disuse. He stopped, cleared his throat and started again, "I'm at my art studio. I'll be home in a few minutes."

"Ok! See you when you get here!"

The click of the line going dead was heavy. Everything was heavy. His head his arms. His thoughts. Words. Ideas. Mino heaved himself up. His arms felt like lead. Had he even painted? The canvas was still blank, his pallet empty. He shook his head before putting the paints away and hanging his smock back in place. Pulling his jacket back on he began the trek back home, tired leaden steps slowing as he came to a stop, looking up at the sky, at the stars peaking through the smog of the city. 

He wondered why he felt so empty. Things were going well for the group, even with Jinu and Hoon in the military, his solo album would be coming out this month, Yoon had never been busier with solo work… and yet.

A shout and Mino turned his head, looking toward the doorway where Hoon stood, waving at him.

"Yah! Mino! Get in here! You'll catch your death of cold!" Hoon's face was light with playfulness, tone serious but teasing. 

Mino smiled, steps suddenly lighter. He hurried forward, into the apartment complex following his fellow Rapper into the warmth of the building. The short distance left to their apartment was covered in comfortable silence, enjoying the simple companionship of walking together with no words exchanged. He felt the mask fading a little, letting a little of the noise through and out. His breath came a little easier, steps lighter. 

The apartment door opened and Yoon's laugh spilled into the hallway, followed by Jinu's indignant squawks as Hoon lead the way into the living space. Mino hadn't realized how much he missed everyone until now. He sat down at the table as Hoon shooed everyone else over and picked up the food off the stove and followed them over, setting it down in the center of the wood. 

All too soon Mino felt the noise rising again as the meal finished and he excused himself to slip into his room, frustration at his own inability to control the rising static from washing over him, mask slipping and tears threatening to fall. He fell onto the bed, letting the soft blankets and pillows catch him, the creak of the door opening and soft footsteps drowned by the thwump of his body hitting the mattress. 

The bed dipped and Mino turned his head, heart leaping into his throat. Hoon sat on the bed, leaning down to pick up Jhonny who had followed him in and gently running his hand through her fur as he settled back again. He said nothing,simply sat there and ran his hands along Jhonny’s back, earning himself approving purrs and the princess herself snuggling down into his legs. Mino watched, eyes half closed, his body relaxing back into the mess of sheets, blankets and pillows on his bed. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

Hoon’s voice was quiet, almost inaudible in the silence that had previously blanketed the room. Mino curled up, clutching his pillow, the words building up, screaming, pushing, shoving at the wall. The mask cracked, crumbled, fell. A flood of words, a mess of loud and jumbled and deafening thoughts came pouring out, falling, spiralling, filling the silence with their emptiness. 

"It's just so loud in here. In my head. My thoughts won't stop racing and chasing each other round and round. There's no end and no sense. Just constant, neverending static and unwelcome, useless thoughts and I just want it to stop." Mino's voice broke at the end, leaving him exhausted, empty and, in an odd sense, relieved. 

He waited silently, for Hoon to say something, to deny, to validate, anything. Instead a soft, but warm weight settled next to him and he felt Hoon wrap an arm around him and pull him close. Jhonny gave a mrow of protest at losing her throne and leapt to the floor as Hoon held Mino and let him cry into his shirt, arms wrapped around him, holding him together as he fell apart. 

Mino melted into the comforting embrace, felt everything that had been building up crumbling away in the warmth of his Hyung's arms. He felt small, but in a good way. Protected and safe and loved. He smiled through his tears.

"Thank you Hyung."

"We'll always be here Mino. Don't worry. Just come to us when you need that reminder."

"Ok Hyung."

Jinu and Yoon found them a little while later, asleep, and smiled softly as they closed the bedroom door. Mino was still snug against Hoon, breath soft and warm but calm and Hoon held him close, a soft smile playing over his sleeping face. 

**Author's Note:**

> These are just so therapeutic to write. I hope others enjoy them, and I'm sorry if Mino and the others get a tad OoC. Thank you for giving my little series a chance.


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